


to be blind (gone ice)

by revoleotion



Category: Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, boba tea date, character is unintentionally ableist, mention of depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-12
Updated: 2020-06-12
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:41:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24684781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/revoleotion/pseuds/revoleotion
Summary: There are days where Yukio wishes he was blind.----Something between a character study and a vent.
Relationships: Moriyama Shiemi/Okumura Yukio
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	to be blind (gone ice)

There are days where he wishes he was blind. It happens when he spots a spider on the bathroom ceiling and yanks the glasses from his face; when everything is too bright and headaches knock on his head like an unwelcome visitor. 

The thought fills him with shame, the kind of shame that adds to the pile of things that will make him lose it. It's always about him, isn't it? 

He's good at making things about himself, to the point of wishing a disability upon himself to cope with being alive. 

Today, it's not that bad. That's how he sees his days now. Not that bad and bad. Doable and impossible. 

“You don't order ice,” Shiemi says. He can tell she's talking for the sake of talking. Silence is not a bad thing, it's just tricky. It catches up to him and embraces him, kills off noises and starts the endless overthinking. 

So, maybe he should be thankful for her nonsense. 

“I don't order ice,” he confirms, causing her to smile a little. She wants more. He's not sure how much he can give. 

“The ice waters down the tea,” he says and counts his words. Would he care for it if he were blind? Maybe he would persuade his brain to offer useful topics to think about. Not some tea he won't even finish. If he could stop seeing the world, maybe he stopped complaining about it. 

“It does? Did I do it wrong?” she asks, and for a second a whiny tone takes over. He grimaces at it and hides his face behind the cup. 

“No,” he says. 

“That's good then.” 

She stays silent for a few seconds, staring into her cup. Melancholy on her face, he wishes he could ignore it. 

“They call it 去冰 in Taiwan,” he hears himself saying. “Which translates to 'gone ice'. Meaning that the ice was in it but is taken out right before the tea is served.” 

Shiemi looks up to him. 

“Gone ice,” she repeats with a huge smile. 

It's not for long but for a fleeting second, Yukio wants to freeze the moment and keep the image of her smile forever. 

Thank God he got to see this. 

**Author's Note:**

> 1) Taking off your glasses to avoid sensory overload is something I experience because I'm hypersensitive but I heard it's common with anxiety/other things too.
> 
> 2) 去冰 is written “qu bing” in Chinese, in case you are curious!


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